Escargo Anyone?

First off, I'd like to mention that the streak is alive and well. I thought I was going to have to reset my throwup streak, but the thought of doing that helped me tough it out. Now Ange is sick which means I haven't slept in 2 days, and explains this post at 3:30 in the morning.

Next, I have now tossed two people this year. I was thinking that I wasn't going to get to toss anyone this year, but in the last five days, the full moon has wrought strange behavior on softball players.

The first victim of the tossing was a guy who was sent home for arguing balls and strikes. In his defense, he was mad that he didn't swing at the most perfect pitch in history. His team had kind of worked me up with sneaky complaining all night about obvious calls, so when he complained, I took it out on him.

The second guy was sent home for dropping an F bomb. In his defense, he did hit a way crappy pop up. Plus, his whole team thought that if you drop a fly ball, it counts as an out as long as the fielder was diving. These rules can be hard to keep track of.

We can only hope I get more opportunities to toss people, because I have a pretty good tossing motion. It comes from years of practice in the shower. I start my hand at my hip, and swing it up toward my head while pointing just over the nearest fence. It's perfect.

I will keep track of all ejections at the bottom of this page. We can only hope the list grows.

We put sod in our backyard recently. John was the only person cool enough to help out, so thanks John. I'll bat you leadoff next game for your troubles. Now that there is grass in our yard, I've noticed this huge snail migration. They come from under my deck, and try to make it across the grass where there is a wooden fence. This seems to be the goal of the snails. I don't know if snails are bad for grass, but they are a little creepy, so the other night, I went out with a small garbage can, and plucked 58 of those snails off this small patch of grass that we have.

I was thinking it would be a good idea to sell them to some French people as expensive food, but there are no French people that live by us, which also explains why I haven't started a bottled water business, or a surrender your country at the first sign of an invasion business.

So I figured I made my point with the snails, because 58 of them were crawling around the garbage can, so I went out 20 minutes later only to find 6 more crawling around. Needless to say, I was not pleased, so I picked them up and threw them on to the road. I threw them as high as I could to see if I could break their shell. I don't know if that makes me a bad person or not.

Then today, I found ten more out on the grass, so clearly, the message isn't being sent. They recieved the same treatment as the others, and I kind of feel bad that I made snails needlessly suffer, but in my defense, they are pretty annoying.

For those who don't know, we'll be blessing Ella, the date, time, and place will be on the Family Wiki here.

The End
F Bomb Nazi