Wise Bubs

At 3 in the morning today, we hear Lincoln screaming. He has been sleeping through the night, se we ignored it for a while, but he was persistent. Ange asked me to make sure he was OK.

I got to his crib, and realized that he has added half a twist to his ‘push his head into a corner of the crib’ trick. So he’s lying on his stomach, which he hates, with his face plastered into the corner of the crib. It was pretty funny. I turned him over, and all was well.

Also, he had his first ‘log’ yesterday. It’s about time I can call him Lincoln Logs. Ange just calls him ‘Logs’ for short.

In other news, I had four students walk out to ‘protest’ the immigration bill the Senate was considering. Like they really wanted to protest, they just wanted to get out of class. I told them they should stage a protest for their real problem… the fact that they have to be in class. Now that’s a protest.

I figure you could use some uplifting sayings, with a few comments from the bubs, so here it is.

Proverbs:

A book is like a garden carried in the pocket. - True, a garden can be carried in the pocket.
A closed mouth catches no flies. - So why would we want to eat flies?
A dimple on the chin, the devil within. - Sounds like this one is talking about me and Lincoln
A dog is wiser than a woman; it does not bark at its master. - Self explanatory
A good husband is healthy and absent. - Oh boy
A house without a dog or a cat is the house of a scoundrel. - I know plenty of scoundrels who own dogs or cats.
A hungry man is an angry man. - This applies to women too.
A monkey never thinks her baby's ugly. - So if you think your baby’s cute, you’re a monkey?
A single Russian hair outweighs half a Pole. - Maybe bragging about how fat they are?
A teacher is better than two books. - That’s some high praise for a teacher
A thief believes everybody steals. - And so does the bubs, who worked at the prison.
A tree falls the way it leans. - Sounds like another Michael Moore conspiracy
A wise man makes his own decisions, an ignorant man follows the public opinion.
A woman has the form of an angel, the heart of a serpent, and the mind of an ass. - I didn’t write it… I just put it up for your enjoyment… I’m not here to make judgments
After shaking hands with a Greek, count your fingers. - Those Greeks like to steal fingers.
An Englishman will burn his bed to catch a flea. - Stupid English, and they think we’re dumb for electing W.
As a dog returneth to his vomit, so a fool returneth to his folly. - I think this one’s in the Bible… not sure where… probably in Proverbs.

Confucius

PS. My no vomit streak is back up to 19 days

Merciful Bubs

Looks as if winter will never end. That’s just as well, the kids are more rowdy if the weather is nice.

My list today only applies to the last 50 years or so…

Greatest Miscarriages of Justice

13- Steph hit me with a bat because I burped… and I was the one who got in trouble.
12- We lost a Region basketball game while I was coaching Mike’s team, because the refs allowed the scorekeeper (father of a child on the other team) to count a ten footer as a 3 pointer. I told the ref I was going to be way mad if we go to overtime. Sure enough… and the rest is history. Plus the ref told me I was the worst ‘sport’ he’s ever seen.
11- Some nerd accused me of sleeping on the job at the prison. I may not be bright, but I know better than to fall asleep at the prison.
10- Judy Miller putting the Kibosh on my cookie business.
9- Me getting diagnosed with ADHD by Jim Jensen, aka genius psychologist.
8- We were watching a movie in 7th grade, and Danny Delahunty was sitting in front of my seat, but on the floor. I leaned over to say something to him… the next thing I know, I have to stay after school for a week, cleaning desks because I ‘spit’ on him.
7- That one baseball field that got turned into a senior citizen’s center.
6- Bubs getting ganged up on while playing Mafia.
5- Hilary Duff’s little sister losing an election to Pedro.
4- Arrested Development being cancelled. I can think of a lot of shows that were cancelled that shouldn’t have been, this is just the latest in a long line… 3rd Rock from the Sun also comes to mind.
3- Kangaroo Jack doing poorly at the box office.
2- Matt winning a backgammon game versus his companion, when his comp only had one piece left, and Matt didn’t have one piece in.
1- Wile E. Coyote never getting the roadrunner despite genius plans and help from ACME.

There sure is a lot of injustice in the world. Notice that I restrained myself from sports for the most part. I don’t have enough time to go through all the injustices the Jazz have suffered at the hands of evil refs.

Or the injustice the Angels suffered at the hands of the evil White Sox. I guess if it’s been 80+ years since you’ve won, it’s alright to cheat to get the victory.

Just like the Bulls cheated against the Jazz, except it had been 11+ months since the Bulls had won a championship.

Big Mac

Glass Cleaning Bubs

The Faculty played the boys basketball team today for a good one. I once again told my class that if I go scoreless, they all get A’s. Obviously, I wasn’t going to go scoreless, because there were only 6 of us.

Anywhoo… 7 seconds into the game, I made a three from the corner, right in front of my class. They took it in stride. The best good one is that they actually kept stats for this game. Here are mine:

2 pts - 2 - 2
3 pts - 1 - 3
FT - 2 - 2
Reb 7
Ast 2
Pts 9

In the second quarter, I had a breakaway lay-up, and this tall kid caught up to me, and swatted the ball into the back wall, then landed on me, and sent my head into the back wall. I got up and made both free throws… that’s what I needed to make free throws, a severe blow to the head. Plus the student body for the next five minutes chanted “You got swatted” every time I touched the ball. I didn’t feel like stopping the game to explain to them that if a foul is called, there is no ‘swat’. Plus, now I have this huge headache.

Then I got that kid back in the forth quarter by diving for a loose ball, and undercutting him. Then he got in my face all tough like. Then I told him to not hate the player, but to hate the game. I made that last part up… about hating.

We were up by 18 at the start of the 4th, and ended up winning by 8, because we were all gassed. In the end, fun was had by all, except for that one kid on the boys team, who looked like that Morrison character from Gonzaga, but in a bad/nerdy way -- and he’s white, and he has no 'stache and he’s slamming his fists into the floor every second.

So, that should do it.

Ralph Nader

John and the Bubs

Today is John's birthday... in honor of the spellcheck nazi, I will post some things that have come to mind about John.

15- UVSC basketball class we had together where the two of us with Devon dominated everyone.
14- Seinfeld marathon before he left on the mish
13- Sledding, I'm sure he's got some stories to share
12- His mega huge mission comp. that fell in the bathtub and broke it.
11- Made, or was a part of homemade movies about many topics including: Lawnmowing, Soccer, and Dunk Contests. (Zee-wo)
10- Favorite movie: Mr. Holland's Opus
9- When his team was losing, had a convenient injury
8- Wiffleball homerun leader
7- The Bubs decided to take John and friends hiking -- it was a nice hike until we tried to get to the top of the waterfall, which meant hiking over a huge ridge, and hanging on to a cliff. Bubs learned his lesson about taking John and friends hiking.
6- Brett teaching John to catch a ball by "eating it, then swallowing it"
5- His only homerun in little league was a towering shot into a huricane force wind, that cleared the fence by 75 feet.
4- Played the Bubs in basketball downstairs, the Bubs always let him win. What a nice brother.
3- Got hit by a car on the 4th of July in Missouri.
2- Got lost on Lone Peak
1- Fell into the river at Tanner's Flat when he was 2 or so. Luckily Steph was there to save the day.

So, I believe that is at least 4 near death experiences that I can come up with off the top of my head. I'm sure there have been more.

Happy Birthday John

The big two three (or so)

The North Going Zax

Wedding Planner Bubs

For those of you who couldn't make it through my last entry, I have a new link where you can see pictures of Link. It's called Picture Pages.

In other news, I was talking to Matt via IM just barely. He has a picture of the Iraqi Information Minister up. Am I the only one who thinks Matt looks exactly like that guy?

On to the list today... and today's list is not a list... it is a schedule of Brett and Rachel's wedding.

I know things can be stressful for people about to be married, so I took the liberty of putting together a schedule for them. If anyone doesn't like the activity planned, they can just go shopping or something.

May 18

4:00:00 pm - Wiffle Ball at the Millburn's house.
6:00:00 - Rehersal Dinner at some fancy restaurant where the butter looks like rasberry ice cream. Pirate Joe knows what I'm talking about.
6:10:00 - Beging eating
6:40:00 - Begin slideshow of select cute pics of Lincoln
7:40:00 - Begin slideshow of all of Brett's cute pictures
7:40:01 - End slideshow, Brett tells story of almost getting beat up at the dirt hills
8:30:00 - Raquetball at Mike's old place
10:00:00 - Watch Mystery Science Theater's "Space Mutiny"
12:00:00 - Retire to bed - Brett dreams of Sugar Plums

May 19

8:00:00 - Arise refreshed
8:10:00 - Breakfast at dad's (waffles)
8:20:00 - Wiffle Ball
10:00:00 - Play Pillage and Plunder
12:00:00 - Wedding Lunch at Wingers
1:00:00 - Wiffle Ball, though we'll all be bogged down, an option here is frisbee golf
2:00:00 - Wedding stuff
4:00:00 - Basketball at the Institute
5:00:00 - Wedding dinner at Tony Roma's
6:00:00 - Reception at an undisclosed location so terrorists can't attack us
9:00:00 - Croquet at Millburn's

So all the planning is over for you guys. I'll waive my usual $5,000 fee for this service because you're family. I hope to see everyone there, again, the fun begins May 18th... just show up at the Millburn's house for a good time.

Bullwinkle

Bitter Bubs

With the WBC winding down, I would like to point out how teams I root for never do well. Here is a list of how I'd want the eight teams that advanced to the second round to finish...

8 - Cuba
7 - Japan
6 - Korea
5 - Venezuela
4 - Mexico
3 - Dominican Republic
2 - Puerto Rico
1 - USA

You will notice a few things, first of all, My 7th and 8th pick are the ones in the final... I guess I'm going for Japan, but either way, we're going to hear about how either Cuba or Japan play baseball the 'right' way.

You may have also noticed that I have Venezuela pretty low for someone who has spent time there. It's because of their stupid president.

Also, Puerto Rico is number 2 because it really is part of the US. A win for Puerto Rico is the same as a win for the US in my book.

Now for some long-awaited pictures of Lincoln.

We took him to the doctor the other day to get his shots -- Which is a very traumatic/sad experience. Lincoln is 96 percentile for height... he has grown about 6 inches in 4 months... he is almost as tall as his 11 month old cousin... so obviously, we are going to need to move from our present location, because niether Lincoln nor the ceiling fan will be safe

So without further adieu

OK...looks like there's going to be more adieu... after several attempts at loading a picture, it looks like I'll have to try later.

So on that note...

The End

Scooter

PS I finally went another route with the pictures... I used photo bucket like Christen. If you are still interested in pictures of the little guy, click on 'Picture Pages' under my Links.

WBC Bubs

Brett's posting prompted me to make a few comments about the World Baseball Classic, before it goes away.

First of all, does anyone know if this is a yearly event or what? I hope so.

I watched the entire USA v Mexico game on the first day of the NCAA tourney. I never thought that could happen.

Cool things about WBC

Early Baseball Fix
Every game actually matters
Covered by mlb tv
All Stars
Get to finally root for players I hate, but that dominate

Not So cool things about WBC

We couldn't make the semi's in our own tournament
The only time Jeter doesn't show timely hitting is when I'm rooting for him
I have to celebrate when Chipper goes deep
Bad officiating -- I don't think major league umps would have missed as many calls, sad but true.
Japaneze lead the tourney in stolen bases... I thought stealing a base was considered 'dishonerable' in Japan baseball.
Americans don't seem to care as much as other countries
Nonstop people talking about how this tournament was dumb, and nobody watched.
Bud Selig

Weird (did I spell that right Matt?) things about WBC

Tiebreaker system -- when Mexico hit that homerun that got ruled not a homerun, and they were arguing -- at that point, them scoring a run eliminates them from the tournament. If they could have gone into the 13th inning tied 0-0, then hit a 3 run homer, they would have advanced.

The Netherlands (or whoever) are the team that pitched the no-hitter

Bud Selig

ESPN telivising early games, and then not telivising the USA game later that day.

Pitch counts

US with one of the higher batting averages, and lower run totals.


I think I've finally put all my thoughts on blog about this.

That would be all

Grandpa Simpson

Big Dance Bubs

Today is the best day of the year. The beginning of the NCAA tourney, where for several days, you can turn on the TV, and see basketball. This is by far the best sporting event in the world. I wish the NBA would wake up and realize that there is no reason to have a seven game series.

There are a few things that annoy me about the tournament, so that is today’s list…

Billy Packer nonstop complaining about how another east coast team didn’t get in - Is it asking too much to finish in the top 8 of your conference to get invited?

Halftime

Pat O’Brien leaving CBS sports to work for Access Hollywood or whatever. (Wait, that’s on my list of strangest career moves)

Rick Majerus saying Offense (Oh - fence)

How I always get burned by picking teams I like

People that brag nonstop about picking an upset. They didn’t know the one team was going to win, they just got lucky.

Infinity timeouts at the end of games

Commercials at the end of games last 8 minutes. Maybe Matt needs it, but I don't need that much time for a bathroom break.

Gonzaga was underrated for years, and now every year, they’re overrated.

My bracket is always ruined 2 hours into day 1

Enjoy the tournament… also USA v. Mexico today, a USA win would get them to the semi’s -- good thing since this is our tournament.

The Scarlet Pimpernel

Canadian Bubs

It seems it has been a while since I’ve posted an entry. I ‘m still trying to recover from that BYU game. How is it that refs always know who I’m rooting for, and manage to lose games for my favorite teams? I’m willing to bet that most of us could score on Plaisted if no rules apply. This wouldn’t have happened if BYU had just blown them out like they should have.

On to the World Baseball Classic. Good one how Canada beat the US 8-6. Unfortunately, that led a certain Canadian I know to believe that Canada is better than the US. Then Canada doesn’t even advance past the first round.

So… I decided to make a list on why Canada Sucks

12- The Canadian Football League – I dare anyone to name one improvement these guys made on real football.
11- Celine Dion – pretty much self explanatory.
10- They have crappy bacon – It’s true.
9- Non-existent military – I think me and Pirate Joe could take over the place armed with a Sharpie and a Peanut Butter Sandwich. Who's going to stop us? The Mounties?
9a- Where were these guys in World War 1 and World War 2? They probably didn’t see Hitler as a threat, because who would want to take over that place?
8- The Toronto Maple Leafs… Isn’t plural for ‘leaf’ leaves? Not that I'm big on spelling, but you'd think they'd bother to spell their team name right.
7- 13th grade – Yes, they go to 13 grades… that’s the rumor.
6- Cost of living is through the roof
5- The street signs don’t tell you what you can’t do (as in ‘no left turn’) they only tell you what is permissible. Mike Smith has my back.
4- 70% income tax – and for what? So they can have a crappy heath care system?
3- Worst weather in the world
2- Gay Marriage
1- Their monopoly money is worthless. (Remember when Homer went to Canada, and was bribing people nonstop for ‘1 American dollar’?)

That should just about wrap things up. The US vs. Japan game is starting right now. I’m going to get on the internet, so Brett can’t watch.

Paul Riser

Tourney Bubs

The following are my predictions for the Mountain west tournament:

Now I know a lot of you are thinking that I only predicted BYU to win, because that's who I want to win. That is true, but it is also true that BYU is the hottest team in the conference right now, so you could say I'm going with the hot hand.

I think BYU does have the toughest road of the favorites in the tourney... they have to beat their rival, who for some reason only wants to play when they are playing against BYU, then they have to beat the top two teams. (If everything goes to form)

SDSU has a much easier road in that their first round game is a gimme (CSU's played well lately, and their close to home, SDSU's too good for them). I think they overlook Vegas, and UNLV will play BYU in the championship.

I'm going to go ahead and pretend that Air Force gets out of the first round for once, then loses to BYU. I don't think a team that relys on the 3 ball so much can win three straight tournament games.

I think the MWC will send SDSU to the big dance, and the winner of BYU/AFA. If the commitee were thinking clearly, I think BYU would be a lock, but for some reason, thier RPI is low, and none of the 'experts' think they're in. I think they deserve to be in more than the 7th ACC or Big 10 team -- probably because I'm a fan.

Begging Bubs

With me being sick for the last couple of weeks, I've forgotten a few things. One of them is to register the Platypi. I'm sure there are still spots available, but I don't have the funds to make it happen. We need to come up with $400+ to register. I am pretty good at getting money back, so anyone that fronts money will get it back (the first three years of Platypi, I lost more than $1000, so I had to learn to get money.) Anyone that has any ideas, or can front all or part of the money -- let me know., but it needs to happen soon. Thank You

Reb Nahem - the beggar